Understanding Fight, Flight, Freeze & Fawn: Your Nervous System’s Trauma Responses

Growth Era Counseling & Wellness | Trauma-Informed Telehealth Therapy in Connecticut

Why You React the Way You Do: It’s Not in Your Head — It’s in Your Nervous System

Have you ever:

• Snapped at someone and felt regret afterward?

• Shut down emotionally during conflict?

• Felt the urge to flee a room or a conversation for no clear reason?

• Found yourself over-explaining, apologizing, or people-pleasing to avoid tension?

These aren't "overreactions" or personality flaws. They're survival responses, and they’re driven by your nervous system.

At Growth Era Counseling & Wellness, we help you understand your emotional and behavioral patterns through a trauma-informed lens. One of the most powerful tools in therapy is learning how your nervous system responds to perceived danger.

What Is the Nervous System and Why Does It Matter in Therapy?

Your nervous system is your body’s communication network. It’s constantly scanning your environment for cues of safety or threat—a process called neuroception.

When your system perceives danger (real or perceived), it activates automatic responses to protect you. These reactions are known as the four trauma responses:

• Fight

• Flight

• Freeze

• Fawn

These aren't conscious choices, they’re biological survival instincts. And for many adults, especially those with trauma histories, these responses get activated frequently, even when there's no actual danger.

The Four Trauma Responses Explained

1. Fight – Confront the Threat

What it looks like:

• Feeling angry, irritable, or explosive

• Arguing or snapping defensively

• Trying to control people or situations

What’s happening:
Your system is preparing you to defend yourself. It sees the threat and decides the best chance of survival is to push back.

In therapy:
We explore where anger may be protecting vulnerability and learn how to regulate and express it safely.

2. Flight – Escape the Threat

What it looks like:

• Anxiety, restlessness, overthinking

• Avoiding conflict, conversations, or decisions

• Needing to “stay busy” to feel okay

What’s happening:
Your system wants to run from danger, physically or emotionally. You may feel like you're always trying to outrun your stress.

In therapy:
We help slow things down, reconnect with the body, and reduce the fear of stillness.

3. Freeze – Shut Down the System

What it looks like:

• Feeling numb or disconnected

• Brain fog or dissociation

• Procrastination or paralysis

What’s happening:
Your nervous system believes fighting or fleeing won’t work, so it shuts down to protect you. This is a common trauma response, especially for those who’ve felt powerless.

In therapy:
We gently support nervous system regulation, help reconnect you with sensation, and create emotional safety.

4. Fawn – Appease the Threat

What it looks like:

• People-pleasing or over-apologizing

• Merging your needs with others'

• Avoiding conflict by being overly agreeable

What’s happening:
Your system believes safety comes from making others happy. This is common in relational trauma or emotionally unpredictable environments.

In therapy:
We work on boundaries, self-worth, and separating your needs from others’ expectations.

Why This Matters for Healing

You can’t “talk your way” out of a trauma response, because it originates in the body, not just the mind.

When you begin to recognize your patterns as nervous system responses (rather than personal flaws), you can:

• Respond instead of react

• Offer yourself compassion instead of criticism

• Reclaim a sense of control and safety in your own body

Understanding these states is a key part of trauma-informed therapy at Growth Era Counseling & Wellness.

 How Therapy Can Help You Regulate Your Nervous System

At Growth Era Counseling & Wellness, we offer telehealth therapy for adults across Connecticut, with a deep commitment to trauma-informed care.

In sessions, we help you:

• Understand your unique nervous system wiring

• Identify triggers and patterns

• Practice grounding and regulation skills

• Reconnect with a sense of agency and safety

We integrate approaches like somatic therapy, mindfulness, Internal Family Systems (IFS), and CBT to support nervous system healing, gently and collaboratively.

Ready to Feel More in Control?

You’re not “too sensitive.” You’re not broken. You’re human—and your body has been trying to protect you.

Let us help you learn how to work with your nervous system, not against it.