When Someone You Love Is Struggling with Mental Health, Therapy Can Help You Too
By: Growth Era Counseling & Wellness
When someone close to you is struggling with their mental health, it's natural to want to help. You may find yourself investing your time, energy, and emotional resources into being there for them—because you care deeply. But what often goes unspoken is the emotional toll this can take on you.
Whether it’s your partner, a family member, or a close friend, their mental health challenges can impact your own well-being in ways you might not realize at first. You might feel overwhelmed, anxious, exhausted, or even guilty for needing space yourself.
You don’t have to go through it alone. Therapy can be a powerful support—not just for the person who’s struggling, but for you, too.
When Your Partner Is Struggling with Mental Health
When your partner is struggling with their mental health, it can be hard to know how to help them. After all, you're not a therapist—you're just someone who loves them. But even without professional training, there are plenty of ways you can make a meaningful difference. In fact, showing up and being there for your partner can be more powerful than you think.
Here are some ways to offer meaningful support while also caring for your own emotional well-being.
1. Listen Without Judgment
Sometimes, the most powerful thing you can offer is simply your presence. Let your partner express how they’re feeling without rushing to fix it. Don’t interrupt. Don’t problem-solve right away. Just listen.
Avoid comments like, “Just be positive,” or “It could be worse.” These can unintentionally dismiss your partner’s pain. Instead, reflect their feelings with empathy:
“It sounds like you're really overwhelmed right now.”
“That must be really hard to sit with.”
This helps your partner feel heard and supported—which can make a big difference.
2. Encourage Professional Help When Needed
Your support matters deeply—but there are limits to what you can do alone. Mental health professionals are trained to help in ways loved ones can’t. Gently encouraging your partner to seek therapy can be an act of care, not criticism.
Try saying:
“I really want you to feel better. Would you be open to looking at some options together?”
Offer to help them research therapists, or even attend a session with them if they’d like. Just be mindful of not pushing too hard—respect their pace and readiness.
3. Know When to Seek Immediate Help
If your partner expresses thoughts of self-harm or suicide, or if you feel they’re in immediate danger, it’s essential to seek help right away. You can:
Call or text 988 (Suicide & Crisis Lifeline)
Contact a mental health professional
Go to the nearest emergency room
You don’t have to handle a crisis on your own—and you shouldn’t. There are trained professionals and resources ready to support both you and your partner in times of urgent need.
4. Take Care of Yourself
This is one of the most overlooked—but most important—parts of supporting a loved one with mental health challenges.
Their struggle can become your struggle. You might start feeling emotionally depleted, anxious, or isolated. You might begin to neglect your own needs or feel guilty for wanting space.
This is where therapy for yourself can be incredibly helpful.
Therapy provides a non-judgmental space where you can:
Process your own emotions
Learn healthy coping strategies
Set boundaries without guilt
Reconnect with your own needs and identity
Reduce the emotional burnout that often comes with caregiving or supporting roles
Taking care of yourself is not selfish. It's sustainable. It allows you to show up for your partner without losing yourself in the process.
5. Be Patient and Avoid Pushing
Healing isn’t a straight line. There will be good days and hard ones. Some days, your partner may feel withdrawn, irritable, or low-energy—and that’s okay.
Give them space when they need it, and avoid pressuring them to “snap out of it” or engage before they're ready. Your quiet, consistent presence matters more than you know.
A simple message like “I’m here whenever you’re ready to talk” can be incredibly grounding for someone who’s struggling.
6. Help Create Healthy Routines
Mental health challenges can disrupt daily routines. You can gently encourage habits that promote stability, such as:
Eating regular meals
Getting enough rest
Moving their body
Spending time outdoors
Staying connected socially
You might say, “Would you like to take a walk together today?” rather than “You need to exercise.” Offering to participate makes it collaborative rather than directive—and more likely to be received with openness.
7. Offer Love and Compassion—Unconditionally
When someone is struggling, they may not always be their best selves. They may withdraw, shut down, or act out of fear or pain.
Remind them—verbally and through your actions—that they are loved, even when they’re not okay. Your steady, compassionate presence can be incredibly healing.
And remember: you don’t have to have the perfect words. Just being there, consistently and kindly, is often more powerful than anything you could say.
You Can Support Them—and Still Take Care of You
It’s important to recognize that while your partner’s mental health is a shared concern, their healing is not your sole responsibility. You’re not their therapist. You’re a caring, supportive partner—and that’s enough.
You deserve support, too. Your feelings are valid. Therapy can give you the space to:
Feel heard and understood
Manage the emotional weight of being a supporter
Set healthy boundaries without guilt
Stay grounded during unpredictable times
It’s okay to say, “This is hard for me, too.” It doesn’t mean you love your partner any less—it means you’re human. And it means you’re doing the courageous work of caring for both them and yourself.
Final Thoughts
Being in a relationship with someone who’s struggling with their mental health can be challenging, but it can also deepen your connection and understanding of one another. With patience, empathy, and support—both for them and for yourself—you can navigate this together.
Therapy can be a powerful tool in that journey. Not just for your partner, but for you. You deserve a space to process, to breathe, and to heal.
You’re not alone in this—and you don’t have to carry it all by yourself.
Want to talk to someone?
If you’re supporting a loved one through a mental health challenge and it’s taking a toll on you, we’re here to help. Therapy can provide the support and guidance you need as you navigate this experience.